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12/23/2011

The sound of a broken heart


I see him standing in front of me. I see his lips move and his hands are flying through the air. His image is clouded, fuzzy somehow. He’s coming closer, his eyes seem huge at this proximity. The white of his eyes seems to glow in the darkened room.

The sun has already gone down and dusk creeps over the land. The nights are quite chilly this time of year. I feel the cold beginning to seep through the windows, the doors. I shiver inwardly. I wonder if we are gonna have the first frost tonight. It’s too early, actually, but the weather is crazy these days…

He’s still gesticulating wildly. His eyes now shimmer from the streetlight shining in. They seem wet somehow, glittery. He’s standing right in front of me now. I can see his torso moving up and down with heavy breaths. His lips stopped moving. They are still parted, like it’s hard to breathe for him; Like he’s waiting for something, waiting for me.

I feel my own breath, flat and irregular. When had it become so erratic? My hands are shaking. I notice it for the first time. They feel cold, too. It’s really cold in here. Maybe I’m freezing. Maybe that’s why my heart beats so frantically. Maybe I was fighting death. My eyes sting. Probably from the cold. I should probably close them; or at least blink. Stop staring at him for just a second…

I blink. He’s still there when I open my eyes again. His lips are moving – again. It’s almost as if  he’s trying to tell me something. I wonder what he’s doing. 

I feel heat on my cheeks. And wetness. Cool wetness spreading over my face. The burning sensation in my eyes is almost unbearable now.

His image is still fuzzy. Like when you’re looking through thick glass – only it’s not glass. It’s water… mixed with salt. And it’s coming from me. I’m crying. MY hands are shaking and I’m crying. I finally hear a sound. It’s the sound of my own erratic sobs, the pulsation of my racing heartbeat in my ears. The sound of a broken heart…



 thanks to Sugarland and their amazing song Keep you for the inspiration

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